


Cameron/Sarah Drabbles and Short Stories

by shyath



Category: Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles
Genre: Community: femslash100, Community: femslash_today, Community: slashthedrabble, Community: smallfandomfest, F/F, Femslash Ficathon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-19
Updated: 2019-12-19
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:47:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 27
Words: 16,886
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21858553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shyath/pseuds/shyath
Summary: Crossposted from Fanfiction.net. Various drabbles and short stories featuring Cameron/Sarah.
Relationships: Sarah Connor/Cameron Phillips
Comments: 1
Kudos: 12





	1. Always Yours

"Shut up!" Cameron snapped before turning around and promptly storming out of the kitchen.

Sarah barely avoided getting run over by an obviously furious terminator by quickly throwing herself flat against the opposite wall. She watched apprehensively as the Tin Miss stomped her way up the stairs, down the corridor and listened for the requisite slam of her bedroom door. It was almost the perfect picture of a typical teenage tantrum. Only Sarah knew Cameron was not a teenager and she should not - could not - therefore be able to throw tantrums. Sarah carefully picked herself off of the wall and started for the kitchen where she had been headed for initially. "What was that all about?" Sarah asked cautiously, confused and more than a little scared.

John had his back to her and he was leaning heavily against the kitchen door. His shoulders shook and when he suddenly fell to his knees, Sarah rushed forward in concern. He waved aside her fretful inquiries and instead gestured animatedly at the general direction of Cameron's bedroom. "She - date," he whispered breathlessly, looking up finally. Tears streaked his cheeks liberally, his face was flushed, but he was grinning.

"What?" Sarah asked, feeling even more confused than she was before - if that was possible.

"She has a date," John said more slowly.

"Who?" Sarah's eyebrows knitted together and she could not help but feel like she was missing something big.

"Cameron," John clarified, his eyes wide as he shot her a meaningful look - as if, by will alone, Sarah would understand all that he had meant to convey.

"She has a date?" Sarah repeated to John, frowning.

"Cameron has a date," John affirmed, his head nodding vigorously.

Sarah shook her head, as if trying to clear away cobwebs. She was discussing the love life of a terminator with her son, who so happened to be the same son responsible for sending the terminator in question back in time to protect him - and her by extension. "Why is she dating anyway?! She is supposed to be protecting you! She has a mission, she -"

"Mom, please," John interrupted gently, "we have been in this town far longer than we have been anywhere else. We haven't had any good leads for close to three months now. We deserve a break. She deserves a break."

Sarah sighed. She hated it when she was wrong and she hated it even more when even her own son could see that she was wrong. "Fine." She offered him a small smile. "Who's the lucky boy then?"

John's grin returned in full force. "It's not a boy."

"Oh," was all the answer Sarah could manage.

* * *

Sarah stopped in front of Cameron's bedroom door. She had been meaning to speak to Cameron all day, but she just could not seem to bring herself to do it. It was now nearly midnight and she had finished just about every single little chore she could find around the house. She supposed she could not avoid having the talk for any longer. That was of course if she wanted to have the talk with Cameron in the first place. She sighed. She might as well just stop worrying and actually set about getting it over and done with. Sarah brought her hand up to knock, but was saved the trouble when the door suddenly swung open.

"Hello, Sarah," Cameron greeted her in that monotone of hers. She did not seem at all surprised to find Sarah hovering outside of her door at a time when most normal human beings could be expected to already be in bed.

"Hey," Sarah offered lamely in response. Feeling more than a little thrown off the pace she had desperately wanted to set for herself, Sarah posed awkwardly, "Mind if I come in?"

"Please," Cameron answered, stepping to the side and holding the door open.

Sarah crossed the threshold and noted distractedly that Cameron was dressed in practically next to nothing: a skimpy tank top and a pair of threadbare shorts. Then again Cameron gravitated decidedly toward the skimpier end of the fashion spectrum. She had been in Cameron's bedroom before when they first moved in, but had not been there since. Sarah did not know what sort of tastes the terminator had in decorating and, admittedly, she could not care too much how the terminator should even choose to decorate her bedroom. However, taking a quick look around and taking in the way Cameron's clothes were haphazardly strewn all over the bedroom, Sarah decided that what looked for all the world like an entire closet imploding on itself was not very Cameron-like. "Are you - redecorating?" she asked tentatively, toeing at a discarded shoebox. Sarah knew for a fact that Cameron was normally neat to a fault. It was in her _programming_ to be so. The mess, quite improbably, threw her off even more than the news of her date.

"No," Cameron replied shortly as she closed the door behind her. She picked her way through the mess easily - _a pre-determined route most likely_ , Sarah thought to herself – and joined Sarah in the middle of the room. "I'm trying to decide on what to wear for my date tomorrow night."

"Right, your date. That's actually what I came to talk to you about." Sarah looked at the assortment of clothes and asked carefully, "Where exactly are you going for this date of yours?" The clothes ranged from formal to casual and it was downright confusing for Sarah to figure out where Cameron was headed for her date.

"Alex is taking me to a movie," Cameron supplied promptly.

"Is that her name?"

"Whose name?"

"Alex. Is Alex your date?"

"Yes." There was a pause as Cameron seemed to consider something. "Alex is a girl."

Sarah snorted. "I'm not homophobic."

"I did not think so. In the future, John told me he suspected you might play for –"

Sarah held up a hand quickly to stop Cameron from telling her what her son – in the future, but her son nonetheless – suspected she might play for. "I only came," she said quickly and loudly, "to wish you good luck. And to remind you to be nice." There was a short silence as Cameron waited quietly for her to say more. "And I suppose I was a little curious."

"Curious?"

"Yeah, this is the first time you've accepted to go on a date." Sarah looked at her with a small frown. "You weren't – programmed to be gay, were you?"

"No."

"Then why?"

"I find Alex to be," Cameron's eyebrows knitted together and Sarah could imagine the gears in Cameron's head working to locate the appropriate words to describe what she found Alex to be, "aesthetically appealing."

"And the others were not?"

"No. It is simply that Alex appeals to me, whereas the others do not."

"Okay," Sarah drawled out. "How does she look like anyway?"

Cameron stopped making eye contact and stared at a spot a few inches to the left of Sarah's head. "It is not relevant."

"Aww, come on," Sarah urged, her inner child coaxed out of hiding by Cameron's strange unwillingness to divulge information, "I'd rather hear how this mysterious Alex looks like from you, but if you won't tell me, you do realise John will. Actually, I'm pretty sure he can't wait to tell."

Cameron sounded small and, if Sarah did not know any better, a little shy when she finally spoke again, "She – looks a lot like you."

"I'm sorry?" Sarah asked quizzically.

"Her hair," Cameron said slowly, her voice taking on a dreamy quality as she suddenly stepped into Sarah's personal space and reached out to tuck a loose strand of Sarah's hair behind one ear, "is the same colour as yours." Cameron's eyes tracked across to meet Sarah's and she offered a smile that looked almost wistful to the older woman. "Her eyes are very much like yours." Those very same eyes dimmed a little with an emotion Sarah refused to identify – and she refused to believe Cameron could feel, only she also knew her own powers of denial could only go so far – as Cameron glanced down at Sarah's lips. "I would like to imagine," she whispered, hovering the pad of her thumb over Sarah's bottom lip, "that her lips would feel and taste like yours."

"Cameron," Sarah rasped. Her mouth felt dry and her body felt like burning. She tried to find the willpower to move, but Cameron's eyes held her captive and she said instead in a voice close to breaking, "You promised –" Memories flashed unbidden across Sarah's mind: and she was reminded anew of the taste of what passed for sweat for Cameron, of the way Cameron shuddered as Sarah's arms wrapped around her waist and her fingers tightened inside, of the heat and the need of Cameron's moans. "You promised not to –"

Cameron sighed raggedly and the sound was so human that Sarah had to stop herself from comforting the girl-robot. "I know," Cameron murmured, her voice pained as it caressed Sarah's cheek in passing. Cameron did not stop gazing at the older woman, her eyes trying to express all that she felt inside, and Sarah almost, almost gave in.

Sarah cleared her throat softly and stepped back, away from Cameron. She needed to put some distance between the two of them. "I have to go," she whispered and it was now Sarah's turn to look away.

"Good night, Sarah," Cameron murmured as Sarah brushed past her.

* * *

The date, Cameron decided, could be considered satisfactory. While she would have appreciated a more confident woman as a date, Cameron had to admit that Alex had tried her best to do all the right things. She had even brought her flowers when she came to pick Cameron up - fifteen minutes early. John had been present to tease, Derek had snorted in disgust before quickly leaving and Sarah - Sarah had locked herself in the garage. Cameron could pick up the sounds of Sarah's fists making contact with the beat-up punching bag as Alex's car pulled out of the driveway and she spent a good portion of the movie worrying about Sarah.

Dinner had been pleasant enough by Cameron's standard. Though she was aware that conversation was rather stunted. Alex was so nervous and she was not really paying attention. She could keep up her end of the conversation well enough, but it felt more like a mission than an actual date: she was being who Alex expected her to be and definitely not who she really was.

When Alex finally offered to drive her home, Cameron was more than happy to accept. She allowed Alex to walk her to the front door and, when Alex shuffled her feet to muster up the courage to kiss her, Cameron leaned in and pressed her lips gently against Alex's. It was a chaste kiss, but Alex's giddy expression told Cameron she was happy enough with it.

"Good night, Alex," Cameron told her neutrally, giving her a small smile as she placed a hand on the doorknob.

"Good night, Cameron," Alex said, blushing.

Cameron thought it was sweet of her to wait for Cameron to enter before leaving, but she could not help but find faults in her or compare her to Sarah - as she had done throughout the evening. Alex's lips felt and tasted nothing like Sarah's; and while her eyes might be the same hue, Alex's had none of the fire Cameron had always found so attractive in Sarah's eyes.

"How was the date?"

Cameron looked up to see Sarah watching her from the top of the stairs, an inscrutable expression on her face. "It was satisfactory."

"She seems nice."

"She is nice." Cameron sighed. "She is simply not you."

There was a sharp intake of breath. "Cameron, don't go there -"

"I am not." A pause. "I am simply stating a fact." Cameron started up the stairs. "I gave her a kiss."

"Yeah?" Sarah's voice took on an unfamiliar, high pitch. Whether in fear or in something else, Cameron could not decide.

"It - was bland." Cameron stopped one step in front of Sarah so that the older woman was given a slight height advantage. "She did not make me feel like I am overheating." Cameron was pleased to see that Sarah had not moved away from her. The fact that it was possibly because she was too shocked to move was irrelevant.

"Cameron, John -"

"John is sleeping with his headphones on." Cameron's eyes pointedly dropped to Sarah's lips.

"Derek -"

"Derek is more than likely passed out from too much alcohol." Sarah's lips parted a little and Cameron could see the tip of Sarah's tongue peeking out to wet a bit of her bottom lip. "I cannot compare Alex to you, Sarah," she whispered almost reverently, taking one of Sarah's hands carefully into hers. "I cannot compare anyone else to you." She brought Sarah's hand up, but stopped short of bringing the back of it to her lips. "I cannot compare the feelings you evoke in me."

"You can't feel," Sarah tried and even her own argument sounded weak to her ears. "I can't do this. We can't do this. Not again," she whispered and her hand shook hard in Cameron's.

"I _can_ feel," Cameron said fervently. "I _feel_ , Sarah." She closed her eyes and opened them again. " _You_ make me feel so much, _too_ _much_ and I cannot even properly describe these - feelings running rampant in my system." The ache was so openly displayed in Cameron's eyes. "I do not know what to call them. But I know for sure that it is only for you that I feel this strongly. It is only for you that I even feel." She placed Sarah's hand on her cheek and closed her eyes as she merely enjoyed the contact. "So please do not tell me that we cannot do this."

"I am so fucked up," Sarah whispered and pushed herself into Cameron. Cameron might be a terminator, but her declaration - of something - was the sweetest and most sincere she had ever heard and she was so very tired of pretending nothing had ever happened between them. "So fucking messed up," she whispered against Cameron's lips, cupping Cameron's face in her hands and feeling wetness underneath her palms.

It was dark and the wall grated hard against her back. Her knees threatened to buckle underneath her and she tasted the hint of spearmint on Cameron's lips - a flavour she knew Cameron was not personally fond of and must therefore be the one on Alex's lips - mingling with the stronger impression of Cameron and that strawberry lip-gloss she was always wearing. Every random kiss on what patch of skin she imagined could see but really could not tasted a little of salt and she was reminded once again that Cameron had actually cried when they finally kissed.

* * *

They eventually made it into Sarah's bedroom and stopped only when the sun broke through and into the sky.

"You have school tomorrow," Sarah whispered, kissing Cameron's exposed shoulder.

"I have school today," Cameron corrected, moaning softly as Sarah's teeth grazed against a sensitive spot.

"Oh yeah," Sarah murmured. "Shall I write you a note?"

"Really?"

"I can't very well let you go to school with hickeys all over you like that!"

"The kids at school would simply think Alex got lucky last night."

Sarah chuckled. "Only she didn't. I did." She waited a beat. "What are you going to tell her?"

"The truth," Cameron answered immediately. "She never stood a chance. I was already yours. I have always been yours."


	2. The Silence Is All There Is And All There Will Be

Sarah prefers it when the door is closed, the windows are shut and the silence is all there is. She wants to think it is the trapped summer heat that is suffocating her, or the stale air, or the much too insistent metal fingers wrapped in soft human skin pressing down, against, _into_ her own all too fragile skin - and she almost, almost believes herself. But this suffocation comes from the inside, from that thing that thumps hard against her ribs (and she refuses to name it because, if she does, it implies that she feels, that she _cares_ ), that reminds her why she fights, why she lives, why she cannot, _should not_ be doing this.

She needs to breathe, but she _wants_ to drown: in this forbidden sensation, in this - this _thing_ that embodies all too well all that she has sacrificed the last sixteen years of her life for. She has come to think of Cameron - of terminators as death itself, as anti-humanity, but it is when Cameron is so close that Sarah's breath hitches, that her blood rushes in her ears, that their bodies press like there is no respecting personal space that Sarah remembers, _acknowledges_ that she is human, that she is alive, that she _feels_.

And she feels so much, so hard, so wrongly and she feels like giving (in or up, it cannot matter) - as long as Cameron is the one who undoes her.

"Sarah," Cameron says her name like she is asking her how Sarah prefers her eggs done, but her fingers are buried deep inside of her, curled just _that way_ and twitching a little. "Come for me."

Cameron's eyes stare and watch and remember ( _sincerely_ , Sarah wills herself to believe), and Sarah comes like she is about to break, like she is about to die, like it is her last moment. When Cameron's free arm wraps around the older woman and soothes her shudders, Sarah cannot help but think that maybe she is about to break, about to die. It can very well be her last moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Written for Challenge #200 ~ Prompt! Battle!: Forbidden at femslash100.


	3. I Can Be Broken Just For You

Cameron comprehends what it means to be broken, comprehends that it is not a desirable state to be in. To be broken is to be a liability to the mission and, despite all her claims to the contrary, Cameron remains true to her basics: to ensure the mission is a success and it simply will not do if she happens to be one of the deterrents.

Cameron is confident however that she is, in all sense of the word, broken. Her system does not seem to function as well as it is meant to and that is simply brushing the surface. She knows her mission and she knows her priorities. John first, then Sarah. Only recently she has made Sarah's safety her top priority instead of John's. More strangely, Cameron finds herself expending the full power of her processor to ensure that Sarah is - happy. Happy is the word, she realises. She wants Sarah to smile and not frown as she is wont to do. It is not like she has not tried to repair the problem. She has run countless diagnoses, but everything reads clear and clean. It cannot be that she is so broken that the separate diagnostics subroutine has been affected.

Cameron is so concerned that she finally confesses to Sarah one day.

She tells the mother of the future saviour of mankind that she is broken and Sarah grips her gun a little harder in response. Cameron tells her that she will not hurt her. And John, she adds almost as an afterthought. It is simply that my system is not functioning as it should, she tells Sarah. What do you mean, Sarah asks, still looking scared but more relaxed than she is before. You are constantly in my thoughts, Cameron says slowly, and my priorities have reset themselves. I want to see you smile and I cannot seem to keep my eyes off of you, she continues, and I register this urge to touch you. Sarah looks like she is fighting a smirk or a scowl and Cameron feels more confused than ever.

When Sarah crooks a finger and tells her to come closer, Cameron obeys without thought. When Sarah presses her lips against hers, Cameron is positive she is more broken than she has suspected. Only the revelation this time does not scare her as much. She has Sarah with her this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Written for Challenge #200 ~ Prompt! Battle!: Broken at femslash100.


	4. We Have Time For One More

"Cameron!" The name comes out as a gasp, but the sentiment behind it does not escape Cameron's increasingly refined ability to emulate and, with that, understand more sophisticated human traits.

"Yes?" Cameron asks, her voice deceptively innocent, her tone infuriatingly mild, but there is a noticeable _shine_ on her bottom lip and her fingers are still buried inside of Sarah.

Sarah fights down the blush that assaults and begins to creep up her neck at the sight. "John is coming down any minute now," she tells the Tin Miss in what she hopes sounds like a firm tone (her fingers tremble as she runs them through matted hair). "Any second now," Sarah murmurs and tries to encourage Cameron to remove her fingers from where they are so very distractingly ensconced at the moment.

Cameron tilts her head to the side and she finally replies after a few moments of silent consideration, "We have time for one more."

"Cameron," Sarah hisses exasperatedly.

Cameron blinks and then directs a positively lewd smile at Sarah. She pushes another finger (and Sarah gasps aloud) and another (Sarah is certain that her backbone is never designed to bend _that_ way) and another (Sarah's cheeks feel like burning and she has no words to describe the raging fire in her nether regions). Shifting the fist she has inside of Sarah and hovering her lips over Sarah's left nipple, Cameron murmurs, "We have time for one more."

Sarah cannot quite bring herself to stop or contradict Cameron.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Written for Challenge #202 ~ Time at femslash100.


	5. Cameron's Little Secret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A prequel to 'With You I Find Salvation', in response to doesnt_go_away's request.

Cameron does not say love, does not dare to - perhaps. She knows that Sarah scoffs at her attempts at being more human, that sometimes Sarah refuses to touch her when she is successful on those rare occasions to display a trait so human that even the older woman is taken aback by it.

Cameron rattles her, John has once told her and he has said it so quietly, so carefully - Cameron understands without too much prodding or explaining that it is a big secret John has imparted (and if she has tears to shed, she may very well have cried listening to John's admission).

But what Cameron never tells John, never tells Sarah, never quite manages to admit to herself is that Sarah rattles her quite thoroughly as well. There is harshness in Sarah that belies her gentleness. Something about the way Sarah traces the planes of Cameron's face, the curves of her body - the palms of her hands never quite making contact with Cameron's skin and Sarah's eyes following the movement of her hands as if in a trance, as if the act is something precious to be undertaken - is so heartbreakingly gentle. She does not have a heart, Cameron knows this, but she understands why so many fear the ache of a broken heart and why so many take the leap nonetheless.

So it is only when Sarah is asleep, is quiet, is peaceful if only for a few moments that Cameron dares to whisper all the things she wishes she has the courage to tell Sarah when both are aware. It is only then that she dares to trace Sarah's face with the pads of her fingers the way Sarah likes to do to her, watch the nuances in Sarah's expression as she leans unconsciously into Cameron's touch, store away for future reference the whisper of her own name as Sarah thrashes about in the throes of another nightmare.

"I love you," is the last thing Cameron tells Sarah every single night. But Sarah needs not know that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Written for 1000th Post Celebratory Kink Meme at femslash_today.


	6. With You I Find Salvation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A sequel to 'Cameron's Little Secret', in response to doesnt_go_away's request.

Sarah's fingers shake as she tries and fails miserably to hold the gun steady. There is no target for her to shoot at, no tangible target at least – and her pathetic attempts at protecting herself from persistent nightmares will only bring harm to herself or, worse, John (Cameron's name refuses to budge from behind her teeth and she fights to keep it there) – but John is already hurt and she slowly but surely is losing the will to listen to her instinct for self-preservation.

There is a silent displacement of _something_ that just tells her that Cameron has entered the room (and she does not want to think why she does not just know when Cameron is close by, she _feels_ it). She releases the sigh she has been keeping in and relaxes into Cameron's hands as the terminator places them on the tense set of her shoulders. "John," she croaks cryptically.

"He'll make it," Cameron replies, understanding what Sarah is trying so hard not to say. "He's damaged, but he'll live."

Cameron's bluntness should hurt, it really should, but the stark honesty she offers Sarah is a welcome change from the awkward omission Derek seems to prefer or the careful manipulation of words that Charley is so good at. "Really?" Sarah whispers, sinking further back into the deceptive softness that is Cameron's body.

"Really," Cameron assures her confidently. There is an endearing hesitation in Cameron's fingers as she inches forward before finally her arms looped around Sarah's neck, half pulling her in, half pushing herself in – and Cameron's chin ends up resting in the crook of Sarah's neck, their noses almost touching while they share one breath and try not to look at each other.

Sarah knows that she should never allow herself this comfort, really. She should never allow herself the luxury of trusting, or even pretending to trust, Cameron – and Derek's increasingly dirty looks aimed at either of them are testament to how badly, how far Sarah has broken the rules she has set down for herself. But Sarah cannot allow rationality to take over how she acts – at least not this once and she definitely cannot allow Derek's displeasure to dictate her decisions.

No one else needs to know why she has begun to trust Cameron, why she has begun to admit that she maybe – _loves_ Cameron. Sarah would be happy if she remains the only one to know the words Cameron whispers at the end of the day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Written for 1000th Post Celebratory Kink Meme at femslash_today.


	7. High On You

"Breathe," Cameron instructs in a soft voice as she runs her hands back up towards Sarah's shoulder blades.

Sarah squeaks out something that cannot be English and her nails dig into Cameron's shoulders. Her knees feel like buckling and she tries to breathe - slowly, normally and then rapidly (but her concentration falters, breaks as Cameron's nose digs into a sensitive spot). _What the hell am I doing?_ she hisses at herself.

Cameron came home from school a few hours earlier and told Sarah that she needed help for one of her classes. What class? Sarah remembers asking. Visual arts, Cameron replied shortly. Oh, Sarah said, which sort? Blind sculpting, was Cameron's response.

Now, Sarah stands in this _barely there_ space between Cameron's thighs in Cameron's bedroom and she has a nagging suspicion that Cameron's thighs are closing in on her. The terminator has a blindfold around her eyes and she is all too near to Sarah's overheated skin. I need to feel you, Cameron told her innocently when Sarah protested their proximity. Cameron's hands drag through and against her shirt, exposing skin and hiding it once again. Sarah feels like hyperventilating. "Aren't you done yet?" she rasps, her knees failing her and her body beginning to fall into Cameron's.

"Yes," Cameron responds, using one hand to remove her blindfold and then looking up and at Sarah. Her eyes are bright, filled with a little too much purpose and the hand on Sarah's hip practically _burns_.

Sarah growls out in frustration and pushes Cameron down. Their lips meet, their legs tangle, their clothes abandoned and much, much later, Cameron has the nerve to tell Sarah, "I remembered to lock the door." Sarah rolls her eyes and tries not to ask Cameron whether or not 'blind sculpting' is merely an excuse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Written for Challenge #219 ~ High at slashthedrabble.


	8. Disaster In The Making

Maybe it is Derek's disapproving glares or John's inquisitive glances, but Sarah goes to great lengths to justify this arrangement she has with Cameron. She tells herself that there is something inhumanly simplistic about the relationship. It is absolutely the truth and definitely a little more – because Cameron is the best example of what inhuman can literally mean.

There is no complication of the emotional sort; no awkward "How was your day?", no "Can we – uhm, tonight -" and definitely no "Is this too hard?" Yeah, definitely that last one, because Sarah likes to play rough once in a while and Cameron can give as well as she can take. Most definitely, though, because Cameron has no understanding of human emotions and Sarah can live with that.

Except this one time Cameron turns to her and asks to spend the night in Sarah's bed and Sarah lets her. And this other time Sarah wakes from a nightmare and Cameron is there holding her like she is something fragile (and Sarah has forgotten what being protected – even if it is only for a short time – feels like). And this other time Sarah is grumbling about what she would have liked to do with that cat from next door with no sense of parameters or hours (some people need sleep!) and that new fire thrower she has just gotten and Cameron is looking at her like she is the best thing to have come after the remote control has been invented or something. But, Sarah decides, this time takes the cake.

"I think I may just fall in love with you," Cameron whispers in between what Sarah is sure is her increasingly perfect emulation of what noises a human woman can and will make when she achieves sexual gratification.

Sarah supposes she should be reacting in some other manner, but she is without a doubt touched, flattered (and her heart is tap dancing like it never should; especially because Cameron's tentative love declaration – if it can even be called that – is not made in the most romantic of contexts). "That's a long way to fall, Cameron," she jokes weakly, lamely (so this spell is broken and she will wake and the most important thing Cameron will say in regards to their relationship will be something that will lead to the terminator hogging the blankets and spending the early morning begging for Sarah's forgiveness and warming Sarah's cold feet in the most creative of ways).

"I know," Cameron tells her, reaching down to place a chaste kiss that shakes Sarah to the core. "But you're more than worth it."

It is at that moment that Sarah realises there is nothing simple about this thing with Cameron and what is worse (or better, she cannot yet decide) is that there is nothing inhuman about this either. When Cameron drops another kiss on her lips, Sarah decides it is high time that her inner voice shuts up. She has a better offer to attend to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Written for Challenge #205 ~ Disaster at femslash100.


	9. In This Moment We Shall Remain

arah has sat out on the top of the porch staircase for sometime now. The sun is setting and the last of its rays bathe Sarah in an impossibly gentle glow, ironic considering the gun swinging easily from one hand. There is a sense of contentment and security about the older woman that seems to extend beyond the air around her because Sarah fails to flinch or, really, react in any manner as Cameron cautiously claims the space next to her.

The terminator has never seen this quiet side of Sarah, but she decides it is a side she very much likes and will no doubt very much enjoy seeing a little more often. So, the Tin Miss sits next to Sarah Connor and does nothing but remain as still as Sarah seems to wish her to be and stores away the memory of this particular moment for future recollection.

* * *

Sarah concedes that being alone _and_ doing so in silence, living the way she does, is quite the blessing. It is only when it is this quiet that she can actually hear her own thoughts so loudly, so clearly. And while she may not know whether these thoughts of hers are relevant or irrelevant, necessary or unnecessary – there is something about this short-lived peace (however misleading the notion may be) that appeals to that part of her she has assumed to have been buried for good.

Sarah also understands that it is quite ironic and very much an oxymoron to have the sentiment she seems to have regarding this lull in activity – that it is in fact thrilling. But, she reasons, having lived the way she has and obviously needing to live the way she will need to, peaceful moments, such as this one that she is having, are the ones that she will need to particularly cherish.

But, even so – the comfort that comes from this silence can be so much more pronounced when it is shared with someone else who understands its value. So, it is not a far-fetched notion that Sarah can find pleasure in Cameron's company, that she can enjoy sitting side by side with the terminator in a space that cannot ever be intended for two adults. Especially because Cameron seems to understand Sarah's need to maintain 'the moment'.

In the silence that prevails, Sarah can almost pretend that they are _just_ Sarah and Cameron. Not, respectively, the mother of the future saviour of mankind and the terminator who is fighting to make sure there is a future for mankind. No, they are not assuming their proper roles. They are not doing anything more strenuous than attempting (and maybe succeeding; not that Sarah is paying much attention to how Cameron is working on regulating and matching her breathing patterns to hers) to breathe in sync.

"What are you thinking about?" Cameron whispers and she is gentle as she breaks the silence – as if she, like Sarah, loathes the idea of not extending the silence further than they have already taken it.

"Nothing," Sarah answers and she is truthful, surprising herself. "And everything."

"I do not understand," Cameron declares, turning to face Sarah.

Sarah refuses to look at Cameron and she stifles the smile that begs to grace her lips. Instead, she tries to be gracious when she finally replies, "I don't expect you to understand."

"Okay," Cameron comments in a tone Sarah can only describe as petulant. Sarah fights not to turn to check the expression Cameron has on her face to match the tone she has used.

"It's just – I like this," Sarah says exasperatedly, not quite sure why she feels the need to explain herself and to Cameron, of all people (or non-people).

"This?" Cameron enquires curiously; bouncing back so quickly that Sarah suspects that the bad mood is only a ruse.

"This silence," Sarah explains, gesturing expansively at their surroundings. "Us," she tells Cameron in a remarkably shy tone. Taking into account all the things they have done (to each other, together and, sometimes, to themselves while in each other's company), it really should be easier for her, but it takes Sarah all she has to place a hand on Cameron's bare thigh. "I like this," she clarifies, gently squeezing the skin beneath her palm. "It almost feels normal."

"Are we not normal?" Cameron asks, drawing a confused frown. "It is my understanding that women can and will be attracted to other women -"

"No," Sarah interrupts Cameron with a chuckle. "Our – circumstances, if you will, what we have to do and what we have to live with." Sarah shifts in her seat and leans in towards Cameron. "Considering everything, what we have is probably the most normal thing in our lives. Of course, that's dispensing with the fact that you came from the future and are nowhere near human – but that's not important." Sarah smiles gently at Cameron and brings her hand up to cup Cameron's cheek, shifting a little in her seat so that their knees touch. Running her thumb across Cameron's cheekbone, she says sincerely, "You are, surprisingly, the one constant in my life, Cameron. And I probably won't admit it if asked, but I won't have it any other way."

Cameron smiles back at Sarah and she closes her eyes as she leans into Sarah's touch. "I like this too, Sarah," she remarks in a monotone that _cannot_ suit the moment, but surprisingly does anyway. "And I like you." She opens her eyes and brings her own hand up to cover the one Sarah has on her cheek. "I love you."

Sarah smiles a little stiffly at the confession (and it is not the first time Cameron has told her these words, but it may very well be the first time she feels the urge to respond in kind – no, not yet), blushes profusely and has to clear her throat several times before she is quite sure of herself to begin stringing a sentence together. "I _like_ you, too," Sarah tells Cameron, staring meaningfully at Cameron as she places emphasis on the word 'like'. There is a voice inside of her head that is nagging her to just come out and tell the terminator what and how she feels for her. _How unfortunate that I can't just shoot you_ , Sarah snipes back at herself. _Bite me_ , the voice replies. _Great, talking to myself, I suppose that_ is _the next logical step after all I've lived through._ "We should go inside," Sarah says when she realises that Cameron is waiting for her to finish or something.

Cameron nods obediently and stands up promptly. She offers a hand gallantly to Sarah, who rolls her eyes at the display of chivalry, but accepts the hand proffered nonetheless.

Sarah makes to head back inside to start dinner (or start burning something and then give up before she allows John to order pizzas), but Cameron's hand on her elbow stops her. "What is it, Cameron?"

"May I come tonight, Sarah?" Cameron asks in a deceptively innocent tone, but her expression says all that her words fail or refuse to – the promise of what is to occur that very night and the three words Cameron have declared earlier echo louder than they ever have the right to.

Sarah tries not to blink, but blink she does and she feels the embarrassing beginning of a blush (once again). She quickly wheels around to hide her face from Cameron's observant gaze. She marches to the door and yanks it open, but she manages to toss out what she hopes can pass as casual, "Yeah, you may come tonight." She refuses to acknowledge the burning gaze following her as she walks away from Cameron and retreats back into the house. She has enough to worry about before night comes and brings with it Cameron and her sweet words.


	10. A Sight For Sore Eyes & A Balm For Bruised Hearts

Cameron blinks as she is drawn out of her other thought processes by another viciously loud explosion that she does not think belongs in the kitchen. Cameron must however admit that she _does_ like that Sarah is hopeless in the kitchen. It makes Sarah impossibly cute – not that Cameron would ever tell that to Sarah.

She somewhat suspects that this particular sentiment of hers will be treated in the very same manner as that one time when Cameron made the mistake of complimenting Sarah's success at brewing a pot of corrosives when Sarah had in fact been attempting a pot of stew. Dodging kitchen knives might very well be beneath Cameron's capabilities, but she could honestly have done away with having to endure Sarah's silent treatment for the better part of the week following the incident.

"Maybe _I_ should be preparing dinner," Cameron interrupts cautiously, measuring the distance between the knife block and Sarah.

Sarah actually growls at her as she turns to toss the remnants of _something_ into the trashcan. "Bite me," she hisses at Cameron before turning back to start cursing at the smoking stove instead.

"Where do you want me to bite you?" Cameron quips back. "And how many times and how hard would you like it to be?"

Sarah stifles a chuckle and makes sure that her face does not betray her mirth before wheeling around to face Cameron. "In case you haven't noticed, I'm trying to prepare dinner here," she says in her most sensible tone. The fact remains that she has not rejected Cameron's offer outright.

Cameron tilts her head to the side and ventures reasonably, "John and Derek will not be returning until it is quite late. I am quite sure we will finish in time for you to prepare dinner. Of course, that is if you would still wish to once we are finished."

Sarah tries and fails miserably to glare at Cameron. "You're being quite presumptuous there, girlie."

"Am I mistaken in my understanding that you would like us to – take this somewhere more private?" Cameron returns evenly in her standard monotone. "I have always wanted to do it once in the kitchen," the terminator continues, her tone almost wistful.

Sarah is sure she almost chokes on her own tongue. "You stroke an old woman's ego, girlie," she says fondly, leaning forward on the kitchen counter on her elbows.

"You are not old, Sarah. Older most definitely, but you are not old at all," Cameron answers so seriously that Sarah has to fight yet again the urge to laugh.

"I'll ignore that comment about me being older because technically I am," Sarah answers.

"You are beautiful, Sarah. I have not seen any woman, younger or older, more beautiful than you are," Cameron comments sincerely.

"You're good for me," Sarah sighs, placing her hand on Cameron's cheek and liking immensely the way Cameron leans into her touch.

"And you are good for me," Cameron whispers back.

"Take me to bed?"

"With pleasure."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Written for Challenge #222 ~ Sore at slashthedrabble.


	11. Make The Seconds Last

Cameron likes listening to the sound of Sarah's heartbeats. She likes it when they beat slowly, likes it when they beat quickly, but she loves that the beats are always, always strong. They are filled with strength to the brim and, if it were not for the very real scars crisscrossing the terrains of Sarah's skin, Cameron could have believed that Sarah is invincible.

(But if Sarah were invincible, what purpose would Cameron serve?)

* * *

Sarah likes to pretend that she is not aware of Cameron's presence, that she is _really_ asleep and that her eyes are not in fact tracking the subtle rise and fall of Cameron's chest, that her breath _does_ _not_ hitch when Cameron's hand comes dangerously close to brushing against her skin – that she does not at all imagine what it could be like to have Cameron stay and never leave.

It is always during these moments of both certainty and uncertainty (like she is standing on the precipice of _something_ and the words should come easily, but no – the silence reigns for another day between the two of them), during these moments when Sarah tries so hard not to be all the things she can so _easily_ become that the shutting of the door always comes too loud, too sudden.

(All that remains is a Cameron-shaped hole seared into Sarah's line of vision and sleep eludes her for the rest of the night as Cameron's predictable, reassuring footsteps echo and carry through to her ears.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Written for Challenge #207 ~ Imagine at femslash100.


	12. Fight With Me

The crash sounds quiet, quiet in a way that only the heaviest of objects can be, but the more than sizable dent in the kitchen floor is testimony enough to the altercation that is occurring. Not that the fact that evidence would be left is Sarah's foremost concern at the moment.

"I will not fight you," Cameron tells her and her voice is strong, is still clear. And Sarah longs for the awkward silence they were just in – when all that broke the stillness was her own harsh panting and Cameron's gentle, _gentle_ exhalations.

Sarah's fingers ache with the effort needed to maintain a hold on the gun. Her hand is shaky and she knows it is more than just about it being a hand she is not accustomed to using. Cameron is looking up at her with an amiable expression, acting like there is nothing amiss. Like Sarah is not straddling her waist, is not pressing a gun to her forehead, is not trying her best or her most foolish to terminate her. "Shut up," Sarah hisses in reply and her voice sounds like breaking, like straining, like maybe she is about to cry (and the tears may never stop). "Just. Shut. Up."

"Sarah, your arm -" Cameron says, the tips of her fingers inching towards the bloody bandage covering the near entirety of Sarah's right arm. Sarah flinches away and she almost regrets the action. She tells herself it is because it hurts like a bitch to move the arm like that and not because of the brief flash of hurt Cameron gets in her eyes when she fails to make contact – and obviously not for her lack of trying. _She is_ not _human_ , Sarah feels the need to remind herself once again and she presses the gun down harder against Cameron's forehead. _Just like the terminator we just met. Just like every single one of them we've met. It's her fault, it's their fault, it's_ her _fault._

"Don't touch me," Sarah warns in a low tone and she releases the safety just to emphasise her point. She wants to hear Cameron's breaths coming in short and hard, wants to see her pulse insistently beating, wants to know that Cameron is afraid – but Cameron is not human, is not wired like that. The pulse remains steady and her breaths remain even. _Not human_ , Sarah tells herself again, but her own inner voice sounds increasingly reluctant.

"Sarah," Cameron tries again and her hand lands solidly on the hand wielding the gun. "It is okay," she whispers, her eyes rising almost timidly to meet Sarah's.

"It's not okay," Sarah croaks and her hand grows lax on the gun.

"Give me the gun, Sarah," Cameron continues and her voice is soothing, is careful.

"No," Sarah answers and her hand tightens around the gun once more.

"Sarah," Cameron says gently. "Please."

Sarah can feel her lower lip trembling, can feel the tears start falling down and she is both ashamed and relieved for it. Cameron is always, always gentle in her dealings with her. Even Kyle fell short compared to the terminator. Kyle never made her feel as safe and secure, never seemed as strong and Kyle definitely would never be able to handle the woman Sarah has now become. Maybe it is Cameron's strength that first attracted Sarah – the realisation triggers more tears. But now, now – "I'm scared," Sarah admits and she hopes, hopes that John is not around to hear this admission.

"Sarah," Cameron murmurs as she pulls Sarah down by the back of her neck so that their foreheads meet. The gun lays forgotten on the floor next to her head. "I promise I will not fight you." Cameron looks Sarah in the eye and Sarah's breath catches at the fierceness she encounters there. "But I will fight _with_ you, next to you. I will protect you." Cameron's eyes move away and her hand caresses Sarah's bandaged arm. " _This_ will not happen again, I promise."

Sarah does not have the heart to remind Cameron that promises do not work so cleanly, so simply in the life they lead, but she likes that Cameron is sentimental enough to tell her all those promises, is _human_ enough to do so. Sarah looks down at Cameron and she smiles a little. The face she now sees is just Cameron's, no other terminators' lapsing over hers. _Just Cameron,_ my _Cameron_. "Don't leave me. Ever."

"I promise," Cameron tells her as she leans up.

Sarah releases a sigh before she closes the distance to meet Cameron halfway through. The taste that is uniquely Cameron's mingles with the saltiness of her own tears and Sarah feels cleansed enough, feels strong enough to fight another day – just as long as Cameron stays to fight with her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Written for Challenge #225 ~ Fight at slashthedrabble.


	13. Break Me Into Pieces Then Put Me Back Together

She is a fleeting fascination, nothing more than something mildly more interesting than the barrel of her own gun to stare at to pass the time. Sarah does not know _what_ it is about Cameron that catches her eyes so, but she just does. _It's something in the way Cameron moves_ , she thinks, _or maybe it's in the way she speaks, the way she looks at me sometimes_ (and the way something _burns_ inside Sarah's chest in reaction).

 _Just a fleeting fascination_ , Sarah tells herself more firmly than before, _that is all Cameron is_ (but a nagging suspicion remains that this – this is slowly growing into a full-fledged obsession). When this weekend is over and John is back, her world will regain some semblance of normality. When that happens, Cameron will be just another fixture in Sarah's life to be easily dismissed and ignored.

"Sarah," Cameron's voice sounds loud and all too near, her breath puffs warmly against the side of Sarah's ear and she can smell that mouth-watering, strawberry-scented shampoo Cameron has recently taken to using (and she wonders why, _why_ fruits can smell so enticing when it is _on_ someone's skin).

Sarah jerks back to put some much needed space between the two of them, her gun firmly pointed at the centre of Cameron's chest and her breaths coming in short and coming out quick – with no relevance whatsoever with what has just happened (or what has come so close to almost happening). She blinks to toss _that_ train of thought out of the window. "Don't you freaking knock?" she spits out to redirect herself, the situation (the world if possible) onto a course she understands, swinging the gun in her hand in a wide, almost amateurish way to gesture at the now opened door of her bedroom.

"I did knock," Cameron replies in an even tone. Her stance is loose as she faces Sarah, her hands unclenched, the quintessential picture of calm and Sarah hates, hates that her own hands are shaking.

"Well, what do you want then?" Sarah snaps.

"It is almost dinnertime and I was wondering if you would perhaps like me to prepare something specific," Cameron answers so matter-of-factly that it is almost irritating. _Can't you lose your damn composure for once, girlie?_

"Just make whatever you'd like, okay," Sarah hisses and begins to turn away.

"Sarah," Cameron speaks up again, the older woman's name dangling off the tip of her tongue like – like a promise or some other sentimental nonsense like that.

"What?!" Sarah growls exasperatedly and she is on the verge of exploding, of giving up, of maybe pulling Cameron into her and seeing, feeling first-hand if Cameron _really_ is all that her dreams insist on making her out to be.

"Nothing," Cameron says flatly, looking confused with herself. "I will come to let you know when dinner is ready." She retreats then, like a defeated soldier, like a terminator run out of battery and the door closes soundly behind her – with a finality that sucks out all of Sarah's ire.

"Terminators don't run on battery, stupid," Sarah grumbles out loud, dropping the gun in her hand and letting herself drop heavily back onto the bed. She feels oh so, so tired all of a sudden.

* * *

"How is it? Is it to your liking?" Cameron asks earnestly, her eyes tracking the movements of Sarah's spoon intently.

"It's good. And I like it," Sarah comments, tearing her eyes away from Cameron's and looking down at her bowl of mixed vegetable rice. "It's a surprisingly healthy choice," she adds to keep the conversation going, poking at a piece of shredded mushroom.

"The recipe caught my eye," Cameron quips, a touch of enthusiasm seeping into her voice and her body as she leans slightly more forward on the dinner table.

Sarah smirks and quickly hides her mirth by swallowing another spoonful. "It's good," she assures Cameron again through a mouthful.

"You have a little something there," Cameron speaks softly, her eyes moving up and focusing on Sarah's face, tracking surely towards the general area of Sarah's lips.

Suddenly feeling very self-conscious, Sarah's spoon freezes midair and her heart feels like it has jumped on the same bandwagon. When it finally starts again, it does so with a beat so furious it is almost painful to withstand. Almost. "Where?" she asks hoarsely.

"Just about there," Cameron says vaguely, but she does not tell Sarah where _there_ is. Sarah watches, almost mesmerised, most definitely transfixed, as Cameron's hand moves off of the surface of the table, reaches across it and lands ever so gently on the side of Sarah's face. There is the briefest of caress to Sarah's cheek and Sarah resists the urge to close her eyes or – god forbid – moan. Then the pads of Cameron's thumb and index finger make contact with the corner of Sarah's lips and she finally removes her hand after what feels like an eternity has passed between them. "Just there," Cameron clarifies, showing the grain of rice trapped between her fingers before swiping it off with the flat of her tongue.

Sarah chokes and her cheeks burn and she cannot help but watch as Cameron puts on that surprisingly erotic display. She continues to stare as Cameron's tongue peeks out once again through the confinements of her lips, almost shy, reticent in its slowness, then it deftly licks at her fingers, retrieving with it the taste of what is left (whatever is left) and then disappearing once again.

Sarah gulps and, to her own ears, the sound is so telling, so revealing. She coughs, clears her throat, coughs again, but her cheeks still feel hot and her throat still feels like it is squeezing upon itself. Sarah just knows she is blushing like she is still in high school and Maddie has just showed what two girls could do given the right incentive and adequate burst of creativity. "Thanks," she croaks out, moving her spoon again and the clang of metal against porcelain is rhythmic, soothing and she slowly begins to breathe at a more normal pace.

"You are very welcome," Cameron responds warmly and maybe it is Sarah reading too much into things or her ears are playing tricks on her, but Sarah thinks Cameron's voice has dropped an octave or two and they have just been flirting or something.

Sarah chances another glance and smiles unsurely at Cameron, but Cameron only looks blankly, unassumingly back. _No, I must have just imagined it all._

* * *

The pain that comes after a fruitful exercise is always therapeutic to the state of her mind. It sets Sarah on course, calibrates her balance and reminds her what she is meant for, what she is meant to do. Sarah sighs and removes her sweaty shirt as she pushes the bathroom door open with the flat of her foot. She is about to loosen the drawstring of her pants and drop them to the floor alongside her shirt when she realises that the bathroom is not, in fact, unoccupied.

Cameron gazes up at Sarah like it is the most normal thing in the world to be soaking in a bubble bath and then having someone walk in on you. "Hello, Sarah."

Sarah's cheeks burn, hotter than they have been earlier that evening. It seems to be the only thing she is good at these days: blushing. She presses her shirt into her bra-clad chest and holds her pants together with the other hand. "Sorry," she manages in a passably normal voice as she attempts to leave the bathroom as smoothly as possible (if _that_ is even still an option left to her). "I'll just – uh, leave you and uh – I'm really, really sorry." _Shut up, Sarah, and just leave!_

"I would not mind if you choose to join me, Sarah," Cameron remarks in a tone that screams reasonable, but the circumstance they are both currently in is anything _but_ reasonable – and surely even Cameron can see that. "There is enough room for two." She obviously is not seeing reason.

Sarah does not think she can blush any deeper than she has already. She can see the heat moving steadily down the length of her arms as she edges out of the bathroom and yes – she can surprisingly blush deeper than she has already. "No, it's okay. It's very generous of you, but I think I'll pass. Do enjoy yourself." She bites her own tongue as an image of how _exactly_ Cameron can enjoy herself comes unbidden – _okay, maybe not so unbidden, so sue me_ – into her mind. "Sorry."

Sarah is so, so close to escaping when Cameron suddenly stands up and reveals herself in full, naked, bubbly – with emphasis on the 'full' and the 'naked' – glory – and oh my, _glory_ is definitely the right word. "I am done. Feel free to use the bath now, Sarah."

Sarah stares, stares and _stares_. She should be ashamed, really. Cameron is a terminator, sure, but she is also supposed to be _her_ _daughter_. She does a poor job of masquerading as one, but she still is and Sarah really, really should not be having, and she most definitely should not be entertaining, the thoughts she is having. "No, seriously. I don't mind just waiting a little longer," she squeaks out and Sarah is almost proud with the amount of control she manages to display.

"I insist, Sarah," Cameron says with a disarmingly sweet smile. She turns slightly to look at the bath. "I will clean this up for you right away," she adds and turns and _bends_. Bubbles still cling stubbornly to the curves and dips of her body, but the view is most assuredly unhindered. It does not help that Cameron is standing there like she is unaware that she is completely naked, like she is unaware that she is _fully_ on display here.

Sarah does not know whether she should be giving thanks or maybe she should be begging for forgiveness. She only knows that she is more than relieved when her legs finally give way and she falls down to the cold, cold floor. She never quite understands the sentiment before, but she can honestly say now – with the experience she has just had, she can die happy. Then the blackness comes and she falls into it gratefully.

* * *

"Please tell me I did not faint," Sarah murmurs thickly, her eyes still closed, but she suspects she is in her bed, in her bedroom and the slightly damp feeling on her forehead is probably a compress.

"You did faint," Cameron replies.

Sarah groans and covers her face with her hands. "I can just die now," she whispers.

"Why?" Cameron asks, sounding almost comical with the degree of alarm she manages to convey.

"I'm so embarrassed," Sarah hisses.

Cameron falls quiet for a moment of contemplation and then she reaches forward to pull Sarah's hands away from her face. Holding them in both of hers, she smiles and enunciates clearly, "I think it is very cute that you fainted."

Sarah groans out loud once again. "That's very helpful."

"You were very cute. Your reactions were cute, but _you_ were cuter," Cameron persists and Sarah does not know that Cameron can be _this_ cruel.

"Shut up," she grumbles.

"Thank you," Cameron cuts in.

Sarah looks up and frowns slightly at the sudden non sequitur. "What for?"

Cameron leans in and drops a chaste, hesitant kiss on Sarah's lips. It tastes, feels like how first kisses should: innocent and gentle and Sarah is beyond touched by it. "I have been dropping hints here and there, but I thought you were not interested. I came very close to giving up hope. When you called out my name and murmured what exactly was going on in your dream, I knew -"

Sarah slaps her hand over Cameron's lips and, once she is assured that Cameron is not going to say more embarrassing things, she pulls Cameron towards her by her ears. "Shut up and just kiss me."

"Whenever, wherever," Cameron whispers before she presses her lips against Sarah's one more time.

Sarah wants to tell Cameron that feeding her cheesy lines like that will not work, wants so badly to pay her back for embarrassing her like that – but hey, what can she say? The lines _are_ working and when a girl like Cameron is kissing you, you _really_ should just shut up and kiss back.


	14. A Photograph of Your Smile

It all started, as this sort of things always happens to be, with one of Cameron's questions.

"Will you stop fussing, John?" Sarah grumbles as she adjusts the timer on the camera once again.

" _Why do you not have a photograph of John and you?"_

Cameron, John and Derek are sitting (more like squashed together) on the living room couch. Cameron, for her part, is sitting with her back ramrod straight and her expression painfully stiff. John, on the other hand, looks torn between being embarrassed and indignant. The rather half-hearted blush colouring his cheeks seems to be a testament to the conflict – or maybe a confused compromise instead. Derek, as to be expected, looks like he would rather be anywhere else but where he currently is – wedged between John and the armrest – alternating the target of his glares from Cameron to Sarah and, at one point, even his own shoes.

" _Would it be possible to have a photograph of all of us together taken?"_

Sarah sighs. Why, why, oh why has she agreed to this? She usually is a lot better at ignoring or rejecting Cameron's suggestions. "John, stop that fidgeting at once. Derek, would it kill you to stop glaring? Cameron, you – why don't you try smiling a little?"

Cameron looks startled. "Am I not smiling?"

Sarah bites the corner of her bottom lip and steps around the camera. "No, you're not," she tells Cameron gently, ignoring Derek's disbelieving snort. She stops in front of Cameron, bends forward a little and places both of her hands on Cameron's cheeks. She likes, _loves_ that Cameron's eyes always, _always_ focus on her right away when she does that (not that she does that all too often – oh, who is she trying to fool?). Swallowing a little, she whispers (she hopes it is not that noticeable – the way her voice has gone husky and the way her fingers tremble a little on Cameron's cheeks), "Smile for me, won't you?"

Cameron does. Sarah is not much for poetry and she never quite considers herself as romantic either. However, in that moment when Cameron's smile appears – no, _blooms_ , she feels like she can most definitely wax poetic and she can most definitely be romantic. She feels like she has transformed into a puddle. There is this warm, threatening to border on feverish, feeling inside of her – and she does not quite know how to describe it (or maybe she simply does not want to) – but it is a pleasant feeling; this formless and liquid and overwhelming sensation. All she wants to do is sigh, melt and just let the moment stand (and not necessarily in the order prescribed).

Derek clears his throat – loudly – and Sarah returns to earth more than a little reluctantly. "Right," she says aloud, straightening, removing hands that feel like they have been burned (branded, perhaps). "Right," she repeats, not quite sure whether is she trying to address her flustered self, a blissfully unaware Cameron, a furious Derek or a blushing John. "I'll just quickly check the timer again."

" _It would be very nice to have a permanent image of your smile, Sarah."_

* * *

The photographs turn out surprisingly normal, Sarah observes as she spreads out the photographs from the other day on the kitchen table before her. _As normal as any dysfunctional family would look like on film_ , she supposes.

Derek is glaring pointedly at a point away from the camera. John is staring right at the camera – his smile frozen and a little less natural than it perhaps could and should be. Cameron – Cameron looks just right, just perfect (though, by now, even Sarah has to admit that she is heavily biased on the topic). It does not however show in the pictures how the two of them were holding hands throughout the whole thing (or worse, how quickly her heart was beating – both worried and thrilled that neither John nor Derek had yet to notice the intertwined hands behind their backs).

"Are those the photographs?" Cameron's voice comes from somewhere behind Sarah.

"Yes -" Sarah begins to answer, turning around as she does, but her lips promptly bump into something very soft, very pliable and just the right amount of wet. "Cameron!" she hisses, the heat rising in her cheeks immediately as she realises that she has just bumped into Cameron's lips. She can see very clearly where Cameron's lip-gloss has become a little smudged from the collision.

Cameron is grinning and looking quite pleased with herself. "Hey, Sarah." She has this glazed look in her eyes, one not quite unlike what a high school student drunk on love would have in his or her eyes (and if Cameron were not a terminator with a mission, Sarah would have found it easier to believe, but why is she with Cameron then? why is she with a terminator? and why does she like it, need it maybe – the desperation, the intensity of her feelings can only be ascribed to necessity, right? how else can, will she justify their relationship?).

"John or, worse, Derek could have seen us!" Sarah maintains indignantly.

Cameron tilts her head to the side. "They are both currently in the garage," Cameron reports. "Neither John nor Derek could have seen us," she assures Sarah as she leans steadily forward.

"What – what are you doing?" Sarah asks cautiously, leaning away.

"Mom?" John's voice suddenly floats in from beyond the kitchen door.

"No, you're not," Sarah tells Cameron firmly, pushing at Cameron's shoulders to encourage her to stop, but once Cameron has decided to do something, it is difficult to stop her. "John is coming, Cameron."

"Yes, I am," Cameron responds, looking and sounding more than a little amused. She brings up a magazine she must have been carrying around and holds it just a little bit away from their faces. The kitchen door begins to open just as Cameron presses her lips to Sarah's and any complaint Sarah might have had vanishes in the warmth of Cameron's lips.

When Sarah's mind finally registers John's voice, she becomes starkly aware of two things: Cameron's missing heat and how quickly the terminator can move when she puts her mind to it. Glaring at an innocent-looking Cameron now sitting all the way across the kitchen table, she turns to John and manages to say, "What is it, John?"

"You were starting to worry me, going all dazed and frozen like that," John says with a chuckle. He then gestures at the photographs. "I was just wondering if you had the photographs with you. You obviously do. Derek was asking if you'd mind him taking a quick look."

"He didn't look all that enthusiastic when we took them," Sarah remarks.

"Well, you know him. He's really bad at being honest," John answers with a shrug. "Do you mind?"

Sarah glances at Cameron. "No, go ahead."

It is only when John's footsteps have died away that Cameron speaks up once again. "May I keep this photograph?" she asks, revealing one that she has obviously taken from the pile John has just left with.

"Which one is it?"

Cameron's cheeks redden a little as she pushes the photograph towards Sarah. It is a picture of the two of them. It was one of the preliminary photographs she took when she was just testing the settings on the camera. Their faces are a little blurry in it, a little too close to the lens – not exactly a model photograph.

"There are better ones to choose," Sarah comments.

"But this is the only one with the two of us alone," Cameron tells her in a small voice.

Sarah's heart hurts a little when it expands all too quickly after hearing Cameron's reason. "We can take a better one later."

"You promise?"

Sarah wonders briefly where the confident Cameron who had stolen a kiss from her earlier had gone, but she supposes it does not matter. "I promise." Cameron blushes a little more deeply at that and the smile that follows is genuine, blinding. "We'll take as many as you want."


	15. Someday I Will Whisper These Words To You

Cameron's breaths come away hot and sweet as they pull apart – and Sarah can feel every puff against her skin like electric shocks. There is this overwhelming headiness attached to her interactions with Cameron. When Cameron makes promises in the heat of the moment (is there even such a thing for terminators?) – promises Sarah knows she probably cannot keep, Sarah always comes so close to believing that Cameron's words alone are enough to give form to dreams, that her willpower will be enough to shield them from the world.

It is in that vulnerable moment when Sarah comes down from another high – sweaty and sated, their mingled scent permeating the air and Cameron's arms securely, reliably around her, the terminator's lips raining down all over her face like Sarah probably means something _special_ – that the words will inevitably try to slip through clenched lips.

"Cameron," Sarah whispers, closing her eyes as she just enjoys Cameron's gentle kisses.

"Yes, Sarah?" Cameron answers promptly, her words soft and subdued and it always surprises Sarah how gentle Cameron can be when she tries.

"I -" The gravity of what she is about to do suddenly occurs to her and she opens her eyes to look into Cameron's. Sarah is reassured by the fierce loyalty she can so obviously see in Cameron's eyes, but she thinks she is most reassured by the hint of warmth just behind the steel. She clears her throat and tries again, "I -"

"What, Sarah?"

Sarah loses her nerve and shakes her head, her cheeks flushed like they are on fire. "Nothing," she murmurs, looping her arms around Cameron's shoulders. "Just – just stay with me." _Forever, if you do not mind._

"Of course," Cameron responds without missing a beat, running a comforting hand down Sarah's back.

 _I love you_.


	16. If Only We Were Characters in a Fairy Tale

"You're staring," Sarah tells Cameron – her voice ragged and breathy, her lips swollen and suspiciously tinted with the exact shade of Cameron's lip gloss.

Cameron refocuses her attention on Sarah with a little effort. It has become a routine of hers recently: to stare at Sarah and to commit every nuance of her person to memory. Cameron does not want to dwell too much on why she feels an almost desperate need to do so. Though she suspects the approaching confrontation with Skynet is probably it. "I am?"

"Yes, and you've stopped," Sarah replies with a smile. She strokes Cameron's cheek with a tenderness Cameron has noticed Sarah only dares to show in private. Cameron closes her eyes and leans into the touch. "What's wrong?"

Cameron frowns as she tries to come up with an appropriate response. "I do not know," she replies unsurely.

"You don't?" Sarah sounds amused and her body shakes in Cameron's arms as the older woman tries unsuccessfully to suppress her laughter.

"Did I say something funny?"

"No, it's just -" Sarah takes a deep breath and lays her head down on Cameron's shoulder, her hands cold – if Cameron could actually feel the chill – as they rest solidly on Cameron's lower back underneath her sweater. "It seems unusual for you not to know the answer to something."

"Is it weird?" The colloquial terms sounds strange coming from her lips, vibrates warmly against Sarah's hair and Cameron holds Sarah closer to her. If only it were possible to never let go.

"No, just - it makes you normal, I guess," Sarah replies, her tone slightly indulgent, a lot affectionate.

"I wish we could be normal," Cameron murmurs wistfully.

"There is no normalcy in the kind of life we lead, Cameron," Sarah reminds her gently.

"Then at least I wish I could love you in normal circumstances," Cameron persists.

"I'm happy enough that you love me." Sarah pauses, her lips a few hairs' breadth away from Cameron's so that her next words literally bounce off Cameron's strawberry-flavoured lips, "Why should it matter whether the circumstances are normal or not?" She flushes a little and continues, "And I think my feelings would be the same given different circumstances."

Cameron whispers, "I do love you, Sarah." Here is another moment to commit to memory.

"I know," Sarah replies, pressing her lips against Cameron's. "I love you too."


	17. Slightly Under the Weather

Sarah groans and rolls over. Even with the pillow over her head, the rain still sounds loud and harsh as it batters insistently against the flimsy windows of her bedroom. Why, why must it rain on the one day that she has the house alone to herself?

"Are you awake, Sarah?" Cameron's voice cuts into Sarah's internal monologue.

Oh, right, Cameron is here, she corrects herself. "I was going to sleep in," she grumbles aloud, tossing the pillow aside. She sits up reluctantly and perks up marginally when Cameron puts down the tray of still hot breakfast she is carrying.

"I made your favourites," Cameron tells her as she continues standing.

Sarah picks up her fork and knife and begins digging in. "It's really good." There is an especially loud rumbling just then and Sarah mutters, "If only the weather is as good."

"The weather should be better in approximately three hours," Cameron announces suddenly, breaking the silence. "The rest of the day should be fairly sunny with low humidity."

Sarah looks surprised. "You – you don't have something like a weather program installed, do you?"

"I was watching the weather report." Cameron pauses and adds, "And no, I do not have a weather program installed."

"Right."

"Would you like me better if I have a weather program installed?"

Sarah nearly bit down on her tongue. "What – no!"

"No, you would not like me better if I have a weather program installed? Does that mean you like me just as I am?"

Sarah's jaw drops. "Not that either!"

Cameron frowns. "What are you saying, Sarah? You do not like me? But, just yesterday -"

 _What am I saying?_ "Yesterday was different!"

Cameron looks dejected. Actually, she probably looks normal. Maybe Sarah is seeing things or maybe she is getting better at reading Cameron or maybe Cameron is getting better at being more human. _Any of those is a scary thought._ "I see. Yesterday was a one-night stand."

Sarah blushes fiercely. "Wait, no. Hold on." She takes a deep breath and pushes the tray away from her. She turns to face Cameron. "Sorry, I'm just –" She takes Cameron's hands into her own. "You caught me off guard."

"So, you do like me?"

Sarah sighs. "If you want to put it that way." Cameron looks unconvinced. Sarah winces and tries again, "I _do_ like you. I honestly do." She tugs Cameron down to her knees and then loops her arms around Cameron's neck. "This 'us' thing is still new. Isn't it normal to be cautious with emotional declarations?"

"I like you, Sarah," Cameron says in a petulant voice.

"Yeah, and I like you too," Sarah assures Cameron, cupping her cheek.

"Really?" Cameron sounds and looks so childlike that Sarah feels the insane urge to pinch her cheeks.

"Really," Sarah says.

Cameron leans forward to press her lips against Sarah's. It is a brief, gentle kiss and Sarah

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Written for jezzikuhinez in answer to her challenge of "Sarah/Cameron and the weather".


	18. Christmas Comes Early For Both Naughty and Nice Girls

_I need a shower_ , Sarah thinks as she drags herself up the stairs. She passes Cameron's bedroom as she always does on her way to her own and she never usually gives the closed door more than a passing glance. This time, however, she does a double take and stops in her tracks. The door is thrown wide open and Cameron is dressed as a – as a – "What are you dressed as?" she asks hoarsely, eyes glued to Cameron's back, running down to the impossibly short skirt and running back up to the definitely impractical cloak over a perfectly fitting vest – all in the telltale red colour.

Cameron turns slowly, adjusting her Santa hat and smoothing her hands down the front of her ensemble. "Santa," Cameron replies simply, looking down at herself before looking back up to Sarah with an expression on her face that says something like 'Can't you tell?'

Sarah blinks, swallows thickly and then clears her throat. "Why?"

Cameron does not answer right away. "We have a play at school," she finally offers.

It sounds like a lie, but with the way Cameron is playing with the hem of her vest – lifting it up and pulling it down again, revealing and concealing bare skin – Sarah cannot bring herself to care enough. "Oh?" she replies huskily. Her cheeks burn as she realises what exactly she has been thinking.

Cameron nods seriously as she approaches. "Yes, I am responsible for the distribution of presents. Apparently I must consult a particular list in order to do so."

"And what list is that?"

Cameron looks around and seems to have discovered 'the list'. "There it is," she announces, turning on the spot and bending over, her skirt riding up and up to –

Sarah leans heavily on the doorway. "Cameron, are you doing this on purpose?" she asks weakly.

Cameron remains bent over as she answers, "Doing what?" Sarah can hear the smile in her seemingly innocent question. Cameron straightens and wheels around, holding a few pieces of papers in her hands. "My naughty or nice list," she informs Sarah.

Sarah feels the warmth shoots southward. "And which list am I on, Santa?"

Cameron maintains her straight expression. "Have you been naughty or nice this year, Sarah Connor?"

"That depends," Sarah responds, stepping into the room and shutting the door behind her. "Is Santa going to punish me for being naughty?"

"It can certainly be arranged," Cameron answers with a tilt of her head.

Sarah stops a foot away from Cameron. "But I've also been quite a nice girl, Santa," she adds.

"Then Santa must reward you," Cameron replies.

"Please, Santa," Sarah whispers before closing the distance between the two of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> /N: Written for Seasonal Femslash Greetings 2009 at Passion and Perfection.


	19. Seeing the Wood for the Trees

John munches on his toast uneasily, glancing first at his mother and then at Cameron. When neither acknowledges him, he turns to Derek with a beseeching look. His uncle simply shrugs, downs his coffee in one noisy go and stands up to leave for wherever it is he likes to spend his free time at. John scowls and resists the urge to blow a raspberry at Derek's retreating back. Putting down his half-eaten toast carefully, he gives himself a quick, hopefully effective pep talk: _Alright, time to be a man about this because obviously you cannot depend on your uncle. Channel your future self, John. Channel the future saviour of humankind. Alright, you can do this, you can do this!_ "So," he starts out in a painfully cheerful tone. "How are we this morning?"

Sarah glares at him and Cameron gives him this look that makes John feel not quite unlike a bug – a squashed bug – a very much dead, squashed bug.

John reaches for his toast again and announces bravely, "Alright, I'll just finish breakfast then and -" Sarah's glare increases in intensity and Cameron's look has shifted for the worse. "Or maybe not," he decides wisely. He quickly gets up, knocking the back of his chair against the wall. "Oops, sorry," John offers sincerely, cursing inwardly as he picks up his bag and makes for the door. He is about to ask whether Cameron is coming or not, but opts against it.

"Well?" Sarah demands in a barely restrained growl as soon as the kitchen door has swung shut behind John.

"It was not my fault," Cameron replies flatly, meeting Sarah's eyes defiantly.

"Did I not tell you to stop?" Sarah hisses, her fingers itching for her gun.

Cameron frowns. "He would not have heard us."

"Yes, he would!"

"If you are so worried about John walking in on us having s -"

"You will not finish that sentence!"

"Are you ashamed of us?"

Sarah reels back. "It's not a matter of shame -"

"Then why are you keeping us a secret?" Sarah could have sworn there is a hint of hurt in Cameron's expression, in her tone, but terminators cannot feel hurt. Can they? _No, they cannot._

Sarah feels the imminent onset of a migraine. "It's just -"

"Then maybe we should stop." Cameron pushes back from the table and gets to her feet much more gracefully than either Derek or John did.

"What?!" Sarah stands up as well, blinking a couple of times – hoping that she has misheard the terminator.

"You are concerned about John finding out about our relationship. The solution is, of course, to cease having a relationship." Cameron tilts her head to the side. "It was nice while it lasted, Sarah Connor."

"That's it? You're dumping me?" Sarah asks incredulously.

Cameron takes a step back. "I do not like being your dirty secret."

"You don't have feelings. How can you tell whether you like or dislike something?" Sarah accuses, feeling very defensive and vulnerable as her arms cross over her chest.

Cameron looks steadily at Sarah and she says evenly after a while, "You are correct. I am a terminator. I do not possess the capacity to feel."

"Get out," Sarah whispers, gesturing blindly at the door. Her eyes feel hot, wet – is she crying? "Get out."

Cameron remains standing where she is and makes no motion to leave. "Are you sad, Sarah?" she enquires, her voice immaculate and impossibly cadenced.

"Get out," Sarah hisses, looking up and at Cameron, not quite able to bring herself to care if the terminator sees her tears. "Just get out of my sight. Leave!"

Cameron takes another step back. This time there is no subtle fluidity in her limbs, no attempt at emulating human motion and expression. Cameron feels, looks and acts more like the terminator she is than she has ever done.

The door clicks shut quietly and Sarah allows her tears to run more freely. _I am not crying_ , she thinks desperately even as she tries and fails to brush away wetness from her cheeks, _not because of a terminator anyway._

* * *

John sighs. "I miss Mom," he says morosely, pushing away his paper plate.

Derek grunts noncommittally, chewing away at his slice of pizza.

"And I miss Cameron," John adds.

Derek chokes and coughs and attempts what John suspects to be an impossible combination of the two. "Wha -" he wheezes. Taking a healthy swig of his beer, Derek tries again, "What are you talking about?"

"I miss Mom and I miss Cameron," John repeats.

"Yeah, I heard the first time, John," Derek growls sarcastically. "Why are you missing the robot for?"

"She's not a robot and she has a name." John sighs. "Haven't you noticed that neither of them have been coming to meals recently?"

Derek rolls his eyes. "Your mother eats. And the robot doesn't need to."

John exhales raggedly. "That's not what I'm trying to say and you know it. I miss Mom's burnt cooking. As for Cameron, I just miss her. She hasn't been going to school either. She just lurks around the house. Mom, she doesn't even glare at me when I bring her food." He looks at Derek. "Do you think something happened between the two of them?"

Derek shrugs. "Women are strange like that. And the robot's probably just being – true to her nature, I don't know. I'm not an expert in either, am I?"

"Something must have happened between them," John maintains.

"Sure, John," Derek answers indulgently. "Now, finish your pizza."

* * *

"Hey," Sarah calls out softly, walking cautiously towards Cameron.

Cameron does not turn around from where she is sitting on the swing.

"You're ignoring me, huh?" Sarah whispers, coming to a stop just a footstep behind Cameron.

"I do not wish to quarrel, Sarah," Cameron says clearly.

"I'm not here to start a fight."

"What is it that you are here to do then?"

Sarah shifts her weight from one foot to the other. "To apologise."

"You have no need to apologise to a terminator."

"Stop that! Just – just don't say that." Sarah takes a deep breath and places her hands on Cameron's stiff shoulders. "I'm sorry." Sarah leans in and wraps her arms around Cameron when the girl makes no move to detach herself from Sarah's trespassing limbs. "I wasn't ashamed of us. I was just – I – I don't know, I don't want John to disapprove of me, of us – I – I was being selfish, sorry, and I took it out on you. I couldn't see the wood for the trees."

"You should give John more credit."

"I know." Sarah sighs and presses herself more fully against Cameron's back. "And I was wrong to say that you don't have feelings. I'm sorry. I was lashing out."

Cameron brings her hands upward and over Sarah's. "I understand. You were hurt." She squeezes Sarah's hands ever so gently and Sarah is touched (yet again) how tender Cameron is when it comes to her. "I was hurt too. I lashed out too."

"I'm sorry," Sarah repeats.

"I apologise as well. I attempted to imply that our relationship meant nothing." Cameron turns in the swing and smiles at Sarah. "It meant everything to me."

Sarah moves a hand up to cup Cameron's cheek. "I, uh, I lo – lo – I love you," Sarah says quickly before she loses her nerve.

Cameron blinks. "I love you too, Sarah," she says simply. "You make me feel more human than anything or anyone ever did, ever would."

Sarah leans in, close enough that she can see herself reflected in Cameron's eyes. "Isn't it ironic that you make me feel the same? I love you, Cameron."

* * *

John sprays water all over the kitchen windows. He blinks a couple of times, rubs his hands hard across his eyes and looks again. "Derek? Derek, I think Mom's kissing Cameron. Uh, I mean, Cameron's kissing Mom. They're – they're kissing each other. Derek?" John turns to find his uncle snoring on the couch. _Oh well,_ he thinks, turning back to look at the two women again, _at least it looks like they've made up_. He scrunches his face suddenly. _Wait, ew, I'm watching my Mom kissing_. He turns away quickly and heads back to bed, attempting all the while to erase the traumatic memory. _Well, at least Cameron's hot_. _No, still ew_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Written for smallfandomfest.


	20. Stay The Night With Me

"You're late."

"Better late than never, Sarah."

"Yeah, yeah. Come here. God, your fingers are cold!"

"They will warm up soon enough."

"What are you talking about? Fuck! Where did you learn to – Ah –"

"I do not sleep."

"That's what you keep telling me. Damn, Cameron, you're – I'm going to –"

"Sarah, you do not wish to wake the house, do you?"

"Then stop doing that!"

"Really?"

"On second thought, keep doing that. Ah – yes, just – another, yes –"

"Do you approve, Sarah?"

"Don't talk and just keep doing that."

"I am capable of multitasking, Sarah."

"Yeah, I'm not. God, deeper, please, Cameron –"

"Like that?"

"Yeah. Oh god –"

"Did you come, Sarah?"

"You know very well I did."

"Happy New Year, Sarah."

"You have a funny way of celebrating it. Come here."

"Did you not like it, Sarah?"

"I did. Now, let me return the favour …"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Written for Challenge #234 ~ Past Prompts Revisited: '#084 ~ Talk Talk Talk (Dialogue Only)' at slashthedrabble.


	21. I Will Not Say It Out Loud Not Yet

Cameron has a way of making Sarah feel wanted. It is in Cameron's heated glances or her tentative touches, in her awkward smiles or her clumsy gestures – or perhaps all of the above. It sounds petty to say so, to even think so, but it is simply how Cameron makes her feel.

"Sarah, is something the matter?" Cameron asks softly, her words brushing so gently against her cheek, against the side of her nose. They are so close that Sarah's breath catches without Cameron having to do anything more than just look at her.

Sarah smiles. "Nothing." _Everything's just perfect_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Written for Challenge #234 ~ Past Prompts Revisited: '#003 ~ Out Loud' at slashthedrabble.


	22. She Is All That I Want

_She is a sensation that overwhelms – like a gentle heat, like a slow burn, like an everlasting sunshine._

Cameron's hands slide ever so slowly, ever so gently up Sarah's back, tracing old and new scars, mapping curves and angles, marking and freeing as she does so. Their breaths mingle in the proximity, their eyes reflecting each other and some things that do not quite belong to the present (not yet at least).

Sarah tears her eyes away. She is so aware of this – this painful pounding in her chest, the way her blood rushes, her feelings fulfilled and yet she is left wanting more. _More what?_

"Look at me, Sarah," Cameron whispers, her eyes intent – Sarah can feel them like a physical pull and she obeys with only a moment's hesitation. Cameron's hands move up to rest on Sarah's shoulder blades, comforting and reassuring in their steadiness, indulgent in the way they burn circles into Sarah's back through her top.

Sarah hears her breath embarrassingly hitches, feels her heart pick up pace. Cameron's heat is pouring off of her in waves and Sarah feels like she is about to be swallowed whole. _So why am I wishing it would happen more quickly?_

"You are so beautiful," Cameron continues, her tone almost reverent as she moves a hand up to cup Sarah's cheek.

Sarah swallows thickly. "Don't say that," she chokes out, her eyes faltering again.

"You are," Cameron insists, holding Sarah's chin up and forcing her to look into Cameron's eyes.

"No, _you're_ beautiful," Sarah lets out somewhat shakily, surprised with how much feeling she has managed to suppress into those few words.

A slow smile lights up Cameron's face, softening her gaze and making her look younger. "Thank you," she says shyly, dropping both her hands to rest on Sarah's hips.

Sarah watches Cameron for a few more moments before remarking softly, reluctant to move away from their temporary bubble, "We should go. John and Derek might be looking for us." Sarah makes to move away, but Cameron's grip tightens just a little. "What is it?"

"I love you, you know," Cameron says earnestly, her eyes big and hopeful and Sarah is so tempted to describe her look as innocent.

"I know," Sarah replies, a touch of affection in her voice. She cups Cameron's cheek and leans in to press their lips together. A second turns into two, into four – until Sarah loses track of time and all she is aware of is the softness of Cameron's lips, their shape and taste and texture as she traces Cameron's lips with the tip of her tongue, with her lips, with her whole being it would seem. "I love you too," she whispers raggedly against Cameron's now slightly swollen lips.

Cameron smiles beatifically at Sarah and drops another chaste kiss on Sarah's lips before finally allowing Sarah to move away.

"We need to go," Sarah reminds her, smiling back.

"I know," Cameron answers, still smiling when she turns for the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Written for Challenge #222 ~ Sunshine at femslash100.


	23. Tentatively In Love

Sarah struggles to give words to this – this strange fluttering in her stomach. It is both too much and not enough. It is a restless feeling, a heavy, overwhelming sensation and yet – yet Sarah suspects that she would break, shatter if she were to let it go, let _her_ go. It is a slow but certain progression toward something more, something overwhelming and Sarah cannot seem to stop herself. Her eyes close as she feels more than sees the fingertips caressing her cheek, the foreign noise of a soft sigh escaping her lips and the even less familiar sensation of peace and contentment settling over her.

"I love you," Cameron whispers for the first time, eyes following the path her fingers are taking.

Sarah feels her resolve – or what has passed for resolve – finally break and she wraps her arms around Cameron, her heart beating and slowing and picking up pace in accordance to the thuds of Cameron's 'heart'. "I love you," Sarah responds, her lips a hair's breadth away from Cameron's ear and something beyond their physical bodies – because she is not quite ready to even pretend Cameron has a soul – touch for that single moment. "So, so much."


	24. Double Impact Right After the Bang

The silence is deafening after the explosion and Sarah feels a little lightheaded as she blindly stumbles forward against the first solid thing she comes across. "Cameron," she croaks, her arm a dead weight at her side and her cheek feels warm and wet and stings a little to the touch. "Cameron," she wheezes again as she forces – or tries to force – her legs to support her before falling painfully back down.

Her vision slowly clears, stars flitting half-heartedly around the edges and black spots dotting her view. "Cameron," she calls more desperately, swinging her head left and then right and she has to push down the bile that rises at the action. The silence remains and Sarah struggles against the onset of a full-blown panic attack.

"Damn it," she hisses. "Don't do this to me, Cameron. Where are you?" She braces herself against the wall she has been leaning against and manages to stand after a few more failed attempts. "Cameron," she mumbles weakly, her breaths coming out in ragged gasps, her sides contracting and expanding rapidly. "Damn it."

She moves across the remnants of the warehouse and has to climb over or walk around mangled remains of their arms suppliers. "Don't ever let the newbie be in charge of the bomb supplies," she tells one of the dead men, shaking her head as she resolutely forges on. "Guess that wouldn't help now anyway."

After what feels like ages – though, in hindsight, it could have been just a few minutes – Sarah comes across Cameron. The terminator's lower half is trapped underneath a huge pile of rabble, but she looks to be in one piece.

"You better be alive or I'll – You better be alive," Sarah whispers as she kneels down next to Cameron, pulling one of Cameron's hands into her lap and waiting for Cameron to wake. She cannot hope to free Cameron alone, especially not in her current condition.

Cameron's fingers flex against Sarah's and a raspy breath escapes her lips. She coughs, red misting the air and flecking her lips and skin. "S-Sarah?"

"I'm here," Sarah replies, her shoulders slumping in relief.

"I feel heavy," Cameron comments, turning her head to see Sarah. "You have a nasty cut across your forehead."

Sarah rolls her eyes. "And you've got what must be a ton of rubble over your lower half."

"I do feel heavy," Cameron repeats. "I will have to wait until I am fully functional before attempting to free myself."

"I know," Sarah says indulgently.

"Sarah?"

"Yes?"

"You are holding my hand."

A pause. "Hush now, you're not fully functional."

"But –"

"Hush."

"You are blushing."

"Seriously, Cameron, hush and let me just hold your hand."

"Okay."

"Good."

"I think I like this."

"Being trapped?"

"No. I like you holding my hand."

"Don't say such embarrassing things."

"But I do. Sarah, you are blushing more deeply."

"Cameron!"

Another pause. "I like –"

"What now?"

"I like you, Sarah."

"I – I like you too."

"Really?"

"Really. Now hush."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Written for Challenge #242 ~ Cut at slashthedrabble.


	25. Would You Call This Love? All It Took Was a Bullet

"Does it hurt?" Sarah asked softly as she stood nervously in the doorway of Cameron's bedroom. She was trying not to pay too much attention to the way the pliers glisten wetly against a brief flash of metal amidst all the broken skin and blood that was the bullet hole in Cameron's shoulder.

There was an unpleasant, almost sickening squelch as the pliers slowly slipped in. Cameron's expression remained unchanged, but Sarah winced before she could stop herself. "A little," Cameron admitted finally. "It could hurt more if I want it to."

Sarah dropped her eyes guiltily. "I'm sorry."

"It wasn't your fault," Cameron told her flatly. Somehow the placid words managed to hurt more than angry ones would. Sarah almost wished that Cameron would lash out instead.

"I shot you."

There was a wet hiss as the pliers disappeared further inside Cameron's shoulder. "Did you mean to?"

"Of course not! It was – an accident. You – you startled me."

"Then it wasn't your fault," Cameron reiterated, pulling out the pliers with a frown. There was no bullet in sight.

"I'm still sorry."

There was a short, awkward silence as Sarah began to fidget and Cameron continued poking at her wound with a clinical detachment Sarah found both horrifying and fascinating. "Help me," Cameron said after a while.

Sarah started. "But I was the one to put that bullet in you! You – what if – those pliers looked damn sharp and you want me near you with those in my hands?!" Maybe the bullet had caused something to short out in Cameron's circuit. Though Sarah suspected the terminator had always been a few gears short anyway.

There was a flicker of _something_ in Cameron's eyes and Sarah inexplicably felt her heart clench. "Please."

"Really?"

Cameron smiled reassuringly. "I trust you, Sarah."

"Okay."


	26. I Mark The Passage of Time

Sarah was not sure when it was exactly that she began to lose herself.

Maybe it was when she realised that she was, that she had been and that she would be doing fundamentally the same routine day after day.

Perhaps it was when she woke up yet again, drenched in cold sweat with the afterimage of the end of the world still before her eyes and she could only feel secure the moment her fingers had wrapped around the cold grip of her gun.

Or it could be when she began finding it difficult to fall asleep and she took to wandering around the house. Her heartbeats would be fast at one point, slow at another and all the while she felt both angry and solemn, like needing to cry or maybe hurt someone. It might have been then – when the sight of a stoic Cameron just standing as she was wont to do calmed and steadied her – that Sarah realised she no longer recognised herself.

"Sarah?"

Sarah looked up at Cameron with a jerk, snapping out of her increasingly disturbing musing. "What?"

"You were just standing there with an odd look. I thought you were ill," Cameron explained.

Sarah resisted the urge to growl in response. She was an adult! Or so she reminded herself. "I'm fine. I was just thinking," she hissed.

"That is good to hear. Your continued good health is vital to the success of the mission," Cameron observed as she returned her attention to the empty street outside.

Sarah felt her heart inexplicably and painfully squeeze at Cameron's neutral remark. "The mission," she mumbled. "Of course."

"Did you say something, Sarah?"

"I didn't say anything." With that, Sarah turned and headed back to her room, telling herself repeatedly that Cameron was just a terminator.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Written for Challenge #237 ~ Damage at femslash100.


	27. Prove Me Wrong

It had been a harmless gibe, but Sarah failed to take into account Cameron's frightening inquisitiveness and the extent to which she was willing to go to prove her point – the point here being that Cameron was not an unschooled virgin (Cameron's words, not Sarah's).

The night of the "trial" came and Sarah had already spent the bulk of her day questioning her sanity (or her apparent lack of it). _Why, why did I volunteer to be the test subject? Why couldn't I direct her to that nice lady down the streets? Why must –_ Three brisk knocks on Sarah's bedroom door dashed all hopes of her furthering the argument against the competing voices in her head and she opened the door despite her misgivings.

"Am I late?" Cameron questioned.

"N-no," Sarah replied warily, letting Cameron through and closing the door behind her. There was something predatory in the way Cameron held herself, in the way she spoke and Sarah waited with bated breath as Cameron turned to approach her. One, two, three steps and the terminator was now so close the two of them were practically breathing the same air. Sarah felt the door solidly against her back and wondered when was it that Cameron managed to back her into a corner. The terminator was gazing down at her with an expression somewhere between lazy and hungry, her fingers trailing fire along the exposed skin between Sarah's slightly hitched top and sweatpants.

Sarah could feel her abdominal muscles twitching traitorously in approval to Cameron's wandering hands, her daring fingers that seemed much too talented for a supposed virgin. Sarah whimpered softly as one of her sensitive spots was discovered, moaning with more abandon as it was teased with more determination and groaning with appreciation as Cameron finally brought their lips together.

"Well?" Cameron interrupted suddenly, pulling away from the warmth of Sarah's lips with a last peck.

"Well what?" Sarah grumbled, not at all happy at the sudden discontinuation and more than slightly distracted by the sight of Cameron's swollen lips and dark eyes.

"I am not an unschooled virgin, am I?" Cameron challenged, looking a little too smug.

Sarah rolled her eyes. "No, you're not. Happy?"

"Very much," Cameron replied, leaning back toward Sarah. "However, I will be happier when we continue with our previous course of action."

"Finally something we can agree on," Sarah remarked with obvious relief.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Written for Challenge #270 ~ Appendage(s) at slashthedrabble.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Written for likeadeuce for Femslash Ficathon 2009.


End file.
